Attention Mann Family Pets: We Are In A Recession!

Way back, at the end of July 2008, I posted a story about one of our gerbils, Blackie. You know, the gerbil we bought for $10 at PetSmart & later paid $150 to have the remainder of its tail amputated when Angelina accidentally pulled it off... Does this ring a bell? Well, I am sorry to report that Blackie has passed away. Did he die a peaceful death? Of course not... This is the Mann household, where peaceful, normal things rarely happen. At about 3am last nite, my deep slumber was disrupted by the cats running around our bedroom, knocking things over. Bob & I incorrectly assumed that they were just experiencing a random bout of friskiness. Unfortunately, at about 3:15 we discovered that the gerbils had managed to disassemble one their tubes & escaped. We found Blackie dead on the playroom floor. There was no blood, no bite marks, just a lifeless little furball. THEN, we found Blondie scared to death, hiding behind my nightstand - missing half of her tail. NOT AGAIN!!! So, at 8 o'clock this morning, Bob transported Blondie back to the same small animal vet across town to have her tail repaired. This time the vet decided not amputate. Instead, he instructed us to the let the tail dry out & fall off. We only had to pay $101 for a butt-load of "gerbil morphine" & antibiotics. Wow, a discount! Please, someone tell Congress that we need a "Pet Bail-Out Plan". I mean seriously.... Now, onto the children. Blackie was Angelina's gerbil & while Bob was at the vet, she discovered that Blackie was missing from her cage. In a panic, Angelina started searching all over the house for her "escaped" gerbil. Like any good mother, I sat my little girl down & lied to her. I told her that Blackie had died of a serious illness during the nite. I couldn't exactly tell her that her beloved kitties had batted Blackie to death. There were lots & lots of tears. And there were even more tears once Caroline delivered her very own "death speech". Caroline shed no tears & proceeded to tell Angelina the following: "Blackie is gone forever, Angelina.... She is not coming back... Yooouu don't have a gerbil anymore, Angelina .... This is real life." Thank you, Caroline. Anyway, when Bob finally returned home, Angelina asked to see Blackie one last time. We honored her request. What we didn't honor was her request to keep Blackie in a shoebox next to her bed for the rest of the weekend.